Saturday, 7 December 2013
"Why'd you have to dazzle me?"
"I'm surprised you can see since you're myopic."
"There's a flicker near my eye sockets. Stop it."
"You're no fun. Gonna blind the tortoise in the basin."
For Trifecta's challenge. Had to use "myopic," "dazzle" and "basin".
Aunt Renie is a peach of a gal.
She dances rumba like no other.
Drinks anything, but only two glasses.
"My limit, deary."
Despite her frail physique,
She is stronger than girls
A quarter her age.
"I was born to see the world."
And shows us her tickets.
From Amsterdam to Paris to Bucharest
All visited in less than a week.
Then tells us of her regret.
"That my best friend passed away,
And didn't get to see the sea.
But with this water from the Mediterranean
It's as if she came along."
And off she goes,
To her next destination.
"Brazil, to see the Rio Festival."
Friday, 6 December 2013
This weeks theme for Friday Fictioneers
I know it says "no trespassing," but maybe I should go over the wall.
No, no, no. What am I talking about? Last time I stepped on a man's property, he ran me off with his shotgun. Almost left me headless.
Yeah. But that's how old goats are.
True. Still, there are mad dogs beyond.
That's why I'm armored to the teeth and have a baton. Just in case.
If five mutts jump me, I won't be able to withstand it, well-knit leather suit or no.
So, I should go away and be a coward?
No. I'm the hero.
Wednesday, 4 December 2013
Oh, my poor buttocks.
It was fine yesterday, but today...
I itched and scratched at it all morning, yet it wouldn't go away.
Not after a bath, nor after sauna.
Now I have a rash the size of a watermelon all over my lovely tush.
Can't even sit to drink my tea.
Oh, Sweet Lips. You said your soap was crab free.
Friday, 29 November 2013
Thursday, 28 November 2013
So, I went to the market square earlier because I had to buy some fruit.
But when I got there, the sellers and the passers-by gathered in a circle.
I managed to make my way in and saw a man twitching on the ground.
His fingers moved in every direction as the moronic mob sucked out his air.
It's inexplicable to me how they could act like that.
Nobody called for an ambulance, so I did it, but by the time they arrived, twenty minutes or so later, he drew his last breath and they were all do-se-do-ing around his lifeless body.
I wanted to throw rotten tomatoes at them, but there were none around, so I just left.
Thursday, 21 November 2013
Thursday, 14 November 2013
Anyway, it's now ten p.m. and a few hours ago a creep jumped me.
After I finished my nightly run on my usual --beach-- route, a guy tiptoed from behind and grabbed me.
First, he put his hand over my chest, then covered my mouth with his other one.
Next thing I know I closed my eyes, inhaled and pulled him over with an uchi mata, a judo technique. Then I punched his nose and thrust my knee in his neck. He fell asleep right away.
Although it crept me out at first, it was a good practice for my judo, as I felt rusty these past few days.
And to think he caught me off guard. Me, whose hearing is top notch. Guess I have to re-learn it.